I woke up on Sunday wondering what the hell had possessed me to accept an invitation to a life drawing class that day. This was scary on so many levels. I didn’t know who’d be there, but the odds were they’d all be art students and would know me as the art school receptionist rather than one of them. I hadn’t drawn anything in a very long time, and when I did, naked people weren’t really my bag. So, not only would I be conspicuous, but my drawing skills would most likely be embarrassingly inadequate.
The class was starting at 2pm and I spent pretty much every waking moment until that time (including the walk there) toying with the idea of wimping out. I was absolutely bricking it. Not being able to find the room once I arrived didn’t help much. I was late and very jittery when I finally arrived. Happily, the lady running the class was utterly lovely and had me set up with an easel and paper in a jiffy.
It was a small class and she had classical music playing (very soothing). I recognised a couple of faces, but I didn’t feel conspicuous as I’d feared. Once I’d settled down a bit, I quite enjoyed drawing. We had a break after the first pose for tea and cake (this is my kind of life drawing class!). I took a deep breath, engaged smile and said “hi” to the first person to catch my eye. I soon discovered that everybody else was scared too. It turns out even art students find life drawing classes scary. Who knew? That made me feel much better and when I settled back down to the drawing I found myself able to get in the zone and really enjoy it. Here are the results:
I left on a high and pretty much bounced home. I did it! I enjoyed it! Fear-of-not-trying totally kicks the arse of fear-of-failure. I’m definitely going back to the next one and will try and think of some scary social challenge to employ during tea and cake time, to stretch myself that bit further.
Say yes to an invitation I would usually turn down: mission accomplished!