If I’d thought much about what it was I’d be doing in a singing lesson, I might have chosen a different challenge for March. I don’t know what I expected. I don’t think I’d given it any thought, other than, ‘this would be a good thing to try and learn to do’. In fact, it wasn’t until I was walking to the lesson itself that I started to ruminate on what I might actually be doing once I got there. Oh, god, will there be weird noises? And SCALES? Oh buggery, is somebody going to hear my VOICE? Shitshitshitshitshit…
I can confirm that all of the above ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Yes, all the above fears were realised. There were weird noises. There were also scales. And yes, somebody did hear my voice. I heard it too and people, it did NOT sound pretty. Oh, and just in case you were wondering, yes, I did feel like a complete dick. However, (and this is important) – I still enjoyed it.
My teacher (a rather beautiful twenty-something living in a fittingly cute and bohemian basement flat stuffed full of music apparel) was absolutely lovely. You’d think showcasing my less than satisfactory voice in front of such a person would be cringeworthy. It was. It really was. She was very encouraging however, and I really had no choice but to just get over it and rise above my mortification.
I had to ahhhahhahh along with this…
What surprised me was how much I learned. How to use my diaphragm. How to even find my diaphragm. How high notes require the use of one’s head voice instead of one’s chest voice (I know – who knew these were things?). It was a revelation that the horrible crack in my voice isn’t an irreparable lack of talent, but something that can be fixed with vocal exercises.
What surprised me even more was that despite being highly embarrassed most of the time, it was ok. Indeed I enjoyed myself. I had, once there, no choice but to face my fear and before I knew it, (ta-dah!) I’d trampled all over another comfort zone. I know – yay me!
I’ve another class booked in for next week. In the meantime, I have scales to practise (dahlings!), which will no doubt be the subject of much hilarity for my husband, should I be brave enough to do it within ear-shot of him.